Bros Before Tuxedo's
by HMS Sunlight
Summary: Shiro never hesitates to listen to his allies if they want to talk to somebody about a personal problem. However, he wasn't expecting Lance to have a personal question about Keith.


The Castle of Lions was unusually quiet. Shiro was reading some Altean literature that Princess Allura had recommended. Between their various skirmishes with the Galra Empire the team made sure to utilize their down time as best as possible. Henceforth, Shiro was rather surprised to hear a knock on his door.

Several thoughts ran through the captain's mind as he walked towards the door. Did Corran need help repairing part of the ship? Was Keith looking for a sparring partner? Could Pidge be looking for some comfort? On the other side of the door was somebody Shiro hadn't expected, bearing an unusually serious expression. "Lance? What are you doing here?"

"Can I talk to you about something? In private?"

Shiro nodded and motioned for his friend to step inside. They had been here for several years now, and this was the first time Lance had come to him for advice. Most of the others had at some point. He supposed it was expected when he was both the oldest and the head of Voltron. Once Lance took a seat on Shiro's bed, it was time to get to business. "Alright buddy, what do you need?"

Lance shifted uncomfortably. "First of all you have to promise not to tell anyone." Shiro noticed that his friend had a hard time making eye contact. "The thing is, it's about Keith."

That explained some things. "Don't worry," Shiro said in a reassuring tone. "Your secret will be safe with me, whatever it is."

Lance smiled a little. "Thanks man. Now to begin, I'm going to have to back up a few years and tell you the whole story"

So this was back in the early days, when we were still getting used to the whole "Defenders of the Universe" deal. You remember how much we all missed earth, right? So anyway, Keith and I were talking one day. It was when the castle was super full with refugees, and they had to stay super cramped together while we each got a whole room to ourselves. On top of that, the nights were getting kind of lonely. I'm sure you've felt that way from time to time, right? Anyway, that's when Keith and I figured we might as well share a room together.

Naturally, after moving in, I remembered there was still only the one bed. I did try to carry another one in, but unfortunately Corran was all "They're bolted to the floor" and "Why aren't you wearing any clothes?" Total jerkface. But then Keith told me we could just share a bed, so I tried that out. He actually has this wierd snore that sounds like a kitten purring, and it's kinda adorable. After a while, I realized his snore was helping me sleep, with its strange soothing sound. And even though we were sharing a bed, I slept above the sheet for the first few weeks. Plus it was actually really fun having a roommate.

The one thing that I did miss about having my own room was the _alone_ time, if you know what I mean. Fortunately we found an awesome solution to that. He walked in on me jerkin' it one day, and despite being ultra mad at first, we decided to compromise. Keith admitted to doing the same thing a couple times while I was away. So I said to him, why not just help out each other? I mean, if we're both doing the same thing alone, we might as well save on time and enrich the experience by doing it as a pair. Naturally, as time went on, our sessions became more involved with each other. It was still fundamentally the same as going solo, but way more fun.

At this point I remember Keith was reading something about marriage laws back on earth. Did you know that married couples get massive tax exemptions? And that got me thinking, when we get back to earth, how much are we gonna owe? I don't know about you, but I haven't paid any taxes in years. So I asked him on the spot, and sure enough, we decided to get married. You remember that, don't you? It was a big event with tons of people we knew, and the party lasted all night. I think you gave us the Tuxedo's we wore. Bit of a weird wedding gift. I had been planning on wearing those _miniature equine_ pajamas, but you insisted otherwise. So yeah, big formal ceremony, since I refuse to pass up an opportunity to party. At the ceremony itself, Keith was in tears thinking about how much money we'll save in taxes. Plus, with a couple you cut down on paperwork by half. Since it was my idea, it's my half of the paperwork that we'll ignore. Sometimes I astound myself with my brilliance.

After a year of this, our room was feeling a bit bare. Sure we'd moved into a bigger place (another benefit of sharing a room, you can guilt trip people into giving you better stuff), but there was still something lacking. So when we rescued that orphan from the Galra, Keith was all, "maybe we should adopt him?" And I thought to myself, yeah, that's an awesome idea. We get an extra little buddy to play with. You remember that right? It took a while for some of the guys to adjust to having a kid with us, but we all love lil' Johnny. Don't think I haven't seen you playing hide and seek with him when you think nobody's around. I know everybody thinks he's pretty great, but with Keith and me it's something way cooler than that.

Anyway, enough of that. The specific reason I'm getting concerned is that this really wierd thing happened last night, and I'm not sure if Keith feels the same way about me as I do about him.

Shiro had withstood many things. He had gone through years of intense training to be a pilot. The Galra had put him through the worst torture they could provide. Yet none of that was as painful as the sheer stupidity of what he was hearing right now.

"...So anyway, there I was, pounding his ass super hard. All of a sudden, my balls swing forward and hit his. No biggie, right? But when I said "no homo," Keith didn't respond. I don't want this to create a barrier between the two of us, but I gotta ask you Shiro. Do you think Keith might be gay?"


End file.
